For administrative reasons, I've moved to an independent url. Instead of "Stroke Steps", it's reborn as "Begin Again." Please come over and subscribe to the new blog. Lots of exciting things coming! I hope you'll join me and I deeply thank you for walking with me this far on my journey.
I look forward to whatever lies ahead.
Click here to see my new home!
Be well,
Jen
Monday 11 July 2016
Thursday 27 June 2013
June = Brain Injury Awareness Month
As we close the month of June, I hope you know that June is Brain Injury Awareness Month!
Did you know that the Right Honourable David Johnston, our Governor General, chose to be the Patron of the Brain Injury Association of Canada in July 2011?
Consider this statement offered for your use (offered by the Brain Injury Association of Canada):
Yesterday, I had the gift of sitting on the grass with a magical woman who works at the Robin Easey Centre in Ottawa. [The Robin Easey Centre is part of the Ottawa Hospital and she comes to offer professional assessments and advice on how to adjust our lifestyle decisions in a way that will work better with my disabilities.] She said that she dreams of a day when community awareness of brain injuries reaches a point that people respond to brain issues the same way they respond to any other illness.
In some ways, when I think about the fog and silence around brain injury, I'm mystified. How could that happen? After all, we are the most digitally aware generation of all time so we can't blame it on access to information. We are also more knowledgeable about the pivotal role that the brain plays in every movement, conscious and subconscious decision, and even our ability to interpret and understand what we do, see or feel. So it's not because we don't value the brain. And, ultimately, we are a very empathetic generation who have accomplished huge things and are routinely giving to worthy causes.
So I started to consider the differences and the other realities in our society.
1) No one likes to be 'sick' and even fewer like to be pitied! (Keep the illness a secret)
The fact that many brain injuries are 'hidden' wounds might sometimes feel convenient because then we don't have to endure those pitying smiles and we don't have any people slowly nodding with lips pressed together - you know what I mean - the smiles that our brethren with a visible disability have to endure. Although it's incumbent upon us to advocate for ourselves, sometimes there is a blessing to just kinda blending in with the world.
However this is a true case of being careful what you wish for because the less people know about a brain injury, especially about YOUR brain injury, the less they are able to respond appropriately. How can a community rally behind an illness when those suffering cannot (or choose not to) speak up...?
2) We want to be on the team! (Act normal so they will pick your name)
Remember when your gym class needed two teams and two students were chosen to pick their team? Remember the dread as the names were called and you just hoped you wouldn't be picked last? Well, it's a hard thing not to be able to contribute to a career, a family, a household, a community in the way we used to. Many of us tend to try to push our limits. It's not a matter of ego (well, not totally) and it's not "keeping up with the Joneses," it's a just that we want to be counted among those who make a difference. We want to be picked for the team!
I wonder what would happen if we all just signed up for the brain injury awareness team. The more of us and, yes, the more athletes and stars they see, the more likely that our world might pause for a second and go "wow, brain injury is serious."
3) "Come on over!" and then "Do Not Disturb" (Use all your energy to please others when others can see and don't worry about your family)
One peril for those with brain injuries is that we will try to operate in limits we set for ourselves prior to our brain injury. Our limits even when we were "well" may not have been reasonable but here we are trying to go, go, go. I am sure those who live with us feel frustrated when they learn we've volunteered to host a family event knowing that we will collapse for a few days after they all go home.
If you have a brain injury, think about it for a second. I know you are probably feeling the way I do: "it was important to me to do it," "I felt so much better doing that" etc... but... what about your spouse or child who didn't get the energy that they count on from you in the following days? What about the strain it puts on the others in the household to all burn a little hotter so that you can accomplish a goal that might not have been necessary in the first place.
Now think about what it's doing for the awareness of brain injury. The family reunion was a great success and you seemed FANTASTIC! When they see you again in six months at Christmas you will look fantastic again. What are the chances that those family members have a high awareness of your brain injury or brain injury in general? Slim. I mean, if you can host a family get together, shouldn't you be at work? (That sounds reasonable considering that they have no idea that one potluck meal took everything out of you for days to come).
4) Symptom confusion (Withdrawal = depression)
In many cases, the brain injury patient is coping very well considering they are facing a major life changing event. We all know the stress of moving, changing jobs, death of a loved one, financial stress... well all of those challenges have repercussions on our capacity (and desire?) to keep up with a former social pace and many of those with a brain injury face several of those challenges at the same time as their brain tries to keep up.
If someone blithely skipped along and attended all the same parties and went out for dinner all the time despite being faced with major issues at home, would you think they are rational? I would not. Our first priority should always be to do a self-check. Consider how you are feeling and what is happening in your life. You might need to cut back on efforts with others to increase efforts in your private life. If you don't address some issues early, you may have a bigger problem on your hands later.
But those who are wise enough to set manageable limits and curtail social things in favour of their own rest, their spouse, kids, or household are sometimes eyed skeptically by peripheral friends as "surely suffering from depression... she hardly ever comes over anymore." This is a sad trend because the injured person tends to have to then spend even more time mythbusting among their social circle trying to convince people that they are feeling quite well, that you've just scoped your life activities down a bit. If that has you nodding, don't be afraid... you are doing the right thing!
Perversely, the more we are 'absent' the less we are able to represent our illness in our communities and social circles... that's a sad paradox, isn't it?
[NOTE: Just make sure your spouse or roommate or someone is close enough to be able to see if you're not getting out of bed, not opening your blinds, not showering often enough. Clinical depression is serious and if you're adrift in a world of grey, you can and really should get help. In the same way that brain injury is an illness and nothing to be ashamed of, so is depression. *hugs*]
5) Charity fatigue (Come on! Cancer is way worse, suck it up and stop whining)
Consider the mail you've received in the last week. Now in your mind's eye, delete the flyers and the spam... now put in one (largest) pile your mail from banks or like, and I bet you will notice in the remaining mail, there are a bunch of charity auctions, raffles, unrequested address labels, etc all accompanied with a very compelling note about the abused animals in your community, a well that needs to be funded overseas, a new goal to find a few million to put in to a hospital or into a disease research program. It's the same for us all I suspect, and sometimes it's daunting to try and get the attention of people already sursaturated with charities.
But here is the bottom line: if you never got that envelope, you would never know about the well.
Here is some simple math. An organization mailed 200,000 envelopes. Two thirds of us just didn't even open it... now we are down to 67,000 people. Of those who did, 9/10 didn't read it all but they got the jist of it (that's about 60,000 people). And maybe a small 0.5% of those will send in a bit of money. That's still about 300 people. It can't hurt, even if it only pays for the mailout because even more important than donations is the fact those 60,000 people are aware of it. And maybe, just maybe, they are thinking "hmm... my nephew had a concussion last year in hockey" or "yeah, my daughter's car accident has changed life for many of us" or "that construction worker who fell off the scaffolding last week... I wonder if that tragedy is leaving him with a permanent brain injury?" or "Uncle Jim's stroke was so tough, especially on Aunt Joyce" or the best of all... "Wow! I had no idea!"
Take a few moments to consider what you can do to raise awareness...
Brain injured and their loved ones, consider:
- blogging (bring the monsters out into the light and let's look at them together)
- live proudly and within your limits
Anyone:
- join an organization in your community helping brain injury awareness
(Brain Injury Association of Canada)
- scour the internet to learn a bit (from reputable sources)
And thank YOU for taking the time to read this. Yes, it counts.
Be well.
Did you know that the Right Honourable David Johnston, our Governor General, chose to be the Patron of the Brain Injury Association of Canada in July 2011?
Consider this statement offered for your use (offered by the Brain Injury Association of Canada):
"As incredible as this may sound, brain injury in Canada is a silent epidemic. In Canada, brain injury is the number one killer and disabler of people under the age of 44. Statistics further indicate that incidences are two times greater within the male population.
Mr. SPEAKER, acquired brain injury is defined as a non-degenerative and non-congenital insult to the brain that may result in a diminished or altered state of consciousness, and result in impaired cognitive, physical, emotional and/or behavioural functioning.
The social, emotional and economic consequences of brain injury are in fact devastating not only to the survivors themselves, but to family members, caregivers, support workers and the community at large – everyone involved with working towards neuro-rehabilitation and recovery . And currently, there are no drugs or techniques that can cure a brain injury.
Automobile accidents, sports injuries, cycling accidents, falls, strokes, tumours, aneurysms, and other non-degenerative conditions are all leading causes of brain acquired Brain Injury in Canada.
I encourage all members of this House, become involved with grassroot brain injury associations and to listen to survivor stories and family members speak about the support and guidance they have received. Their true life stories will fascinate you. Their courage and determination is really quite remarkable."
Yesterday, I had the gift of sitting on the grass with a magical woman who works at the Robin Easey Centre in Ottawa. [The Robin Easey Centre is part of the Ottawa Hospital and she comes to offer professional assessments and advice on how to adjust our lifestyle decisions in a way that will work better with my disabilities.] She said that she dreams of a day when community awareness of brain injuries reaches a point that people respond to brain issues the same way they respond to any other illness.
So I started to consider the differences and the other realities in our society.
1) No one likes to be 'sick' and even fewer like to be pitied! (Keep the illness a secret)
The fact that many brain injuries are 'hidden' wounds might sometimes feel convenient because then we don't have to endure those pitying smiles and we don't have any people slowly nodding with lips pressed together - you know what I mean - the smiles that our brethren with a visible disability have to endure. Although it's incumbent upon us to advocate for ourselves, sometimes there is a blessing to just kinda blending in with the world.
However this is a true case of being careful what you wish for because the less people know about a brain injury, especially about YOUR brain injury, the less they are able to respond appropriately. How can a community rally behind an illness when those suffering cannot (or choose not to) speak up...?
2) We want to be on the team! (Act normal so they will pick your name)
Remember when your gym class needed two teams and two students were chosen to pick their team? Remember the dread as the names were called and you just hoped you wouldn't be picked last? Well, it's a hard thing not to be able to contribute to a career, a family, a household, a community in the way we used to. Many of us tend to try to push our limits. It's not a matter of ego (well, not totally) and it's not "keeping up with the Joneses," it's a just that we want to be counted among those who make a difference. We want to be picked for the team!
I wonder what would happen if we all just signed up for the brain injury awareness team. The more of us and, yes, the more athletes and stars they see, the more likely that our world might pause for a second and go "wow, brain injury is serious."
3) "Come on over!" and then "Do Not Disturb" (Use all your energy to please others when others can see and don't worry about your family)
One peril for those with brain injuries is that we will try to operate in limits we set for ourselves prior to our brain injury. Our limits even when we were "well" may not have been reasonable but here we are trying to go, go, go. I am sure those who live with us feel frustrated when they learn we've volunteered to host a family event knowing that we will collapse for a few days after they all go home.
If you have a brain injury, think about it for a second. I know you are probably feeling the way I do: "it was important to me to do it," "I felt so much better doing that" etc... but... what about your spouse or child who didn't get the energy that they count on from you in the following days? What about the strain it puts on the others in the household to all burn a little hotter so that you can accomplish a goal that might not have been necessary in the first place.
Now think about what it's doing for the awareness of brain injury. The family reunion was a great success and you seemed FANTASTIC! When they see you again in six months at Christmas you will look fantastic again. What are the chances that those family members have a high awareness of your brain injury or brain injury in general? Slim. I mean, if you can host a family get together, shouldn't you be at work? (That sounds reasonable considering that they have no idea that one potluck meal took everything out of you for days to come).
4) Symptom confusion (Withdrawal = depression)
In many cases, the brain injury patient is coping very well considering they are facing a major life changing event. We all know the stress of moving, changing jobs, death of a loved one, financial stress... well all of those challenges have repercussions on our capacity (and desire?) to keep up with a former social pace and many of those with a brain injury face several of those challenges at the same time as their brain tries to keep up.
If someone blithely skipped along and attended all the same parties and went out for dinner all the time despite being faced with major issues at home, would you think they are rational? I would not. Our first priority should always be to do a self-check. Consider how you are feeling and what is happening in your life. You might need to cut back on efforts with others to increase efforts in your private life. If you don't address some issues early, you may have a bigger problem on your hands later.
But those who are wise enough to set manageable limits and curtail social things in favour of their own rest, their spouse, kids, or household are sometimes eyed skeptically by peripheral friends as "surely suffering from depression... she hardly ever comes over anymore." This is a sad trend because the injured person tends to have to then spend even more time mythbusting among their social circle trying to convince people that they are feeling quite well, that you've just scoped your life activities down a bit. If that has you nodding, don't be afraid... you are doing the right thing!
Perversely, the more we are 'absent' the less we are able to represent our illness in our communities and social circles... that's a sad paradox, isn't it?
[NOTE: Just make sure your spouse or roommate or someone is close enough to be able to see if you're not getting out of bed, not opening your blinds, not showering often enough. Clinical depression is serious and if you're adrift in a world of grey, you can and really should get help. In the same way that brain injury is an illness and nothing to be ashamed of, so is depression. *hugs*]
5) Charity fatigue (Come on! Cancer is way worse, suck it up and stop whining)
Consider the mail you've received in the last week. Now in your mind's eye, delete the flyers and the spam... now put in one (largest) pile your mail from banks or like, and I bet you will notice in the remaining mail, there are a bunch of charity auctions, raffles, unrequested address labels, etc all accompanied with a very compelling note about the abused animals in your community, a well that needs to be funded overseas, a new goal to find a few million to put in to a hospital or into a disease research program. It's the same for us all I suspect, and sometimes it's daunting to try and get the attention of people already sursaturated with charities.
But here is the bottom line: if you never got that envelope, you would never know about the well.
Here is some simple math. An organization mailed 200,000 envelopes. Two thirds of us just didn't even open it... now we are down to 67,000 people. Of those who did, 9/10 didn't read it all but they got the jist of it (that's about 60,000 people). And maybe a small 0.5% of those will send in a bit of money. That's still about 300 people. It can't hurt, even if it only pays for the mailout because even more important than donations is the fact those 60,000 people are aware of it. And maybe, just maybe, they are thinking "hmm... my nephew had a concussion last year in hockey" or "yeah, my daughter's car accident has changed life for many of us" or "that construction worker who fell off the scaffolding last week... I wonder if that tragedy is leaving him with a permanent brain injury?" or "Uncle Jim's stroke was so tough, especially on Aunt Joyce" or the best of all... "Wow! I had no idea!"
Take a few moments to consider what you can do to raise awareness...
Brain injured and their loved ones, consider:
- blogging (bring the monsters out into the light and let's look at them together)
- live proudly and within your limits
Anyone:
- join an organization in your community helping brain injury awareness
(Brain Injury Association of Canada)
- scour the internet to learn a bit (from reputable sources)
And thank YOU for taking the time to read this. Yes, it counts.
Be well.
Tuesday 25 June 2013
From unexpected places
 |
| Me with an exhibit I built inworld |
What works about this for me is my ability to control it all. Given that I can have a seizure if I am overstimulated or tired, this virtual world allows me to manage what I see onscreen to reduce visual stimulation; turn off sounds to reduce auditory stimulation; and, when I need a break, I log off! It's that easy.
The people aren't as easy to leave, but that's another story.
As with any collection of people there are all kinds of different types... some you wish you'd never bumped into and others who change your life in a positive way. Over the years of being there, I have now learned to be more wise about the people I keep company with online.
Anyway, after much time, I am now coming into my own. My avatar is 3.5 years old now so I guess, in that world, I am maturing beyond my rebellious teenage time online. [My avatar was always an adult, but maybe the avatar operator -me- was a bit immature.]
So now I go to live music events, poetry readings, classes, lots of things that are the "real Jen." Sometimes I even go dancing or play cards with friends.
One thing I never expected was the spiritual side of this online universe. At first, when I logged in, I could leave behind my real life obligations and escape... but it wasn't long before I learned that that was a false front and it was doing a disservice to myself. It also made me start to feel a bit frustrated. I couldn't put my finger on it at the time but I was losing touch with myself in the sense that parts of me were feeling silenced and pushed off to the side.
Sadly, even my faith seemed to be left behind when I logged on. I wasn't faithless. I just got swept away by the virtual world and the freedom of trying on new lives. It's complicated and likely non-sensical to those of you who have never spent time in a virtual environment, but it's a very interesting social ... experiment (for lack of a better world).
 |
| A photo I took inworld where we meditate |
I have recently offered to help with the mornning sessions since I am available and can help without a commute! What a treat.
But the thing that is so meaningful is the people I meet and "work" with. All magnificent people who are very inclusive and quite inspirational in their own ways.
Maybe someday I will get brave enough to tell you more about it. But for now, I offer this virtual peek into a place that lets all the abled and disabled participate on equal footing.
Be well.
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